Amazon, I love you, But I want to break up [UPDATED]

Email I just sent to Amazon.

Dear Amazon: I can't believe you stoop as low as that and hide the ability to close my account so thoroughly that I now have to engage in a multi- message email discussion with you to convince you to do so. Please CLOSE my account!

If you want to close your Amazon account, good luck, you will be playing hide and seek with them. Kind of lame.

Ok, I sent them that email, and it seems they still won't let me go! Lame^2. Here's what their response email says:

Dear Pito,

Here are some things to keep in mind:

-- If you use your log-in on other sites (e.g.,,, international Amazon sites except for and, etc.), you'll also lose access to those accounts.
-- If you've placed orders on AmazonLocal, you'll no longer have access to your vouchers.
-- Any open orders you have will be canceled.
-- All subscriptions will be canceled (Amazon Prime, Subscribe and Save, etc.).
-- If you have a remaining Gift Card or promotional credit balance, you won't have access to use the funds.
-- Returns and refunds can't be processed for orders on closed accounts.
-- You won't be able to initiate Textbook Rental returns and will remain responsible for outstanding rentals.
-- You won't be able to access Kindle, Amazon Instant Video or Amazon Appstore content.
-- You won’t be able to re-download content from your Games & Software Library.
-- Your Amazon Payments account will be closed and can't be reopened.
-- We can't transfer the history of an account to another account.
-We will delete your customer profile as well as all your reviews, discussion posts and customer images.
-- You'll no longer have access to your Associates, Amazon Web Services, Seller, Author Central, Kindle Direct Publishing and/or Mechanical Turk accounts.
-- If you have an Amazon Web Services account, please contact AWS customer support for assistance with closing your AWS account : account…

If you still want to close your account after reviewing the items above, please write back by visiting this link and state that you want to close your account: